Sources: CBS 60 Minutes, John Boehner interview with Lesley Stahl, Dec 12, 2010
A little crying on the floor of the US House of Representatives this week reminded me of how I was struck by last month’s 60 Minutes segment profiling our new House Speaker, John Boehner. Boehner cried at several points during that interview, each time related to a comment or question about living the American Dream. The report also showed clips of other famous political criers. The 1972 tears of Edmund Muskie, Hillary Clinton during her presidential campaign in 2008, George Bush talking of the family tragedies brought about by 9-11, and even Barack Obama on the death of his grandmother the day before his election to president.
I started to think of other situations where there were tears, and when they were good or bad from a leadership influence standpoint. And I remember the maxim “there are no happy tears” from my graduate school training.
Whether or not the tears are appropriate (or effective, from a leadership standpoint) is definitely bound by culture. Certain environments or organizational climates tolerate emotional expression, while others don’t. I can envision an emotional outburst at an advertising agency, where creative energies must flow rather freely to generate new ideas, as an acceptable response. I can also envision the discomfort among passengers in an airplane when a teary pilot announces trouble up ahead.
In leadership situations, I don’t think that gender makes a difference even if there is a gender difference.
People pointed to Muskie’s tears as the end to his 1972 campaign. But watching the clip on 60 Minutes gave me a different thought. Muskie denied he cried, despite the video evidence, saying they were snowflakes melting on his cheek. I am too young to remember the ‘72 campaign very well, but I suspect the career-ending event was more to do with the denial of tears than their presence.
Many have criticized conservative commentator Glenn Beck, who apparently cries regularly on his show, as trying to manipulate others by using his tears to connect emotionally with his audience. Beck’s politics and behavior splits people quite distinctly into lovers or haters. The lovers agree with his views and see the tears as genuine. The haters disagree with his views and see the tears as fake.
In 2008 Hillary’s tears showed her as a more vulnerable, warm person with a heart—something that was not much in her reputation at the time. I think tears also worked well in the situations that led to George Bush and Barack Obama welling up on camera. And they worked well, I think, for John Boehner, largely because they were genuine and not apparently manipulative. He admits that people who know him “know that I cry” and that it is part of what makes him who he is.
Authenticity, or being genuine, seems to be the key when it comes to tears in leadership.
Author: Dr. Paul M. Connolly
